Blog 4 April 26 2018
“Expectation: the act or state of expecting or the state of being expected. 2. (usually pl) something looked forward to, whether feared or hoped for: we have great expectations for his future, their worst expectations. 3. an attitude of expectancy or hope; anticipation: to regard something with expectation.”
The risks and danger of following preconceived ‘Thoughts, Notions and Assumptions’ are woven throughout this evolving story between me and Rhett. As you engage and share this chapter of our journey, allow the emotions to encircle and surround you and the chosen words. Look for the lesson you are meant to discover, your personal lesson. It’s there!
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I digress, let me backup a bit. When I was on my way home with Rhett, he didn’t really have a name yet, not what would be ‘our name’. I had tossed around spanish sounding names like Alejandro and Italian names like Fabio and Antonio, but they just didn’t seem to fit. Oh well, not to worry, once he and I had spent some time together, we’d know what his name was to be.
Remember the BFF Florida friends who were with me in Tennessee in August 2013 for 4 days while we were ‘testing or trying’ Rhett for ‘my sole’ purposes? They are actually the ones who named him as they were driving home, which was the last day I was alone with him. (Goosebumps!)
They kept seeing a semi on the interstate called “Rhett Butler Trucking”. They laughed and said “Karen’s truck is named Scarlett (Red Ram Dodge 2500) and she calls her trailer “Tara”, so it’s only fitting that this handsome dark haired hunk is called Rhett. Thanks BFF’s, you had no idea how true it would be !!
See the strong resemblance??? 🙂
The name stuck, it fit. What I didn’t know was how perfect it would for him. I heard him say many times, with abounding confidence, “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn” at my suggestion of having ‘conversations’ about space, boundaries and safety. Pure perfection in a name !
The dreams continued, of a friendly, magnificent white stallion who leapt with joy in ‘airs above the ground’ and stood his ground with a bull ! “Remember, I am your dream horse, remember that…I am your dream horse. “ Rhett continued to say every night as I drifted off into my place of bliss, my dream of the magnificent white dancing horse!
That short 8 week waiting time period consisted of completing adoption applications, obtaining reference letters, gathering hoof trimmer, vet, dentist, massage therapist, chiropractor, energyworker’s contact info. Yep – all that was necessary to adopt a horse from the Lipizzan Rescue Foundation.
Well… not all of it, I sorta ‘over-delivered’ on the required documentation. Rhett insisted on it in my present dreams. ”You have to put your best face on, your have to make a strong impression. You are the one that is to help me heal”. he repeated several times. Hence, the reason for the over-documentation!
Repairs needed to be made to the barn and fencing, things that I had grown complacent with since the current herd had been together for 3+ years and weren’t prone to getting into trouble….well, only one of them had the “get into trouble” gene! Bless him !
Those eight weeks flew by and my application for adopting Rhett was approved in mid Sept, so I began making arrangements to drive my truck and trailer to TN and pick him up. His foster had three weeks to play with trailer loading, something that hadn’t been addressed since he was delivered from NY, via shipper, 7 months prior.
On Oct 8 2013, I left Newnan to drive to Nashville.
My expectation was that I would drive up one day (6hrs), have dinner with friends. Next morning, visit with foster for an hour or so while we got him ready to load and drive home. (Learning Lesson)
After driving not only through Atlanta traffic, but also Chattanooga traffic on the way up to Tennessee, I arrived at the foster barn with my truck and trailer FULL of angst and expectations.
Imagine what those expectations might be for you? I had no idea how many I had already placed on myself and I hadn’t even seen Rhett yet!!
Expectations! Expectations already made without any way of knowing the circumstances and responses/reactions/triggers, appropriate or inappropriate, that Rhett or I would show during any of our interactions.
It’s so blindingly obvious to me NOW how many EXPECTATIONS I was placing on him (and me), unknowingly of course. Man, sometimes reality really does suck.
Expectation: the act or state of expecting or the state of being expected. 2. (usually pl) something looked forward to, whether feared or hoped for: we have great expectations for his future, their worst expectations. 3. an attitude of expectancy or hope; anticipation: to regard.
And that led me down a dark, winding spiral of thoughts and assumptions, questioning EVERYTHING about this situation I was finding myself in. Did I need another horse? Did I need this kind of horse? Did I need a rescue horse? Did I need a rescue horse with baggage? Did I need any of this??
ASSUMPTION…as·sump·tion: a thing that is accepted as true or as certain to happen, without proof. ”they made certain assumptions about the market”. 2. The action of taking or beginning to take power or responsibility.”the assumption of an active role in settlements”.
ALL the assumptions I made about exactly how this next 2 days would go were – well, they weren’t quite going as planned. This next 2 days were going to….wait—
ALL the EXPECTATIONS and ASSUMPTIONS I had made about exactly how this next 2 days would go were all getting ready to come crashing down on my plans.
My plans! What I had been putting out to the Universe for 2 months! My Plans! MY. PLANS.
Do you see your personal ‘lesson’ in this story so far?
Next: Come’On Rhett, let’s go home….
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2 Replies to “BLOG 4: “The Imminent Risks of Preconceived “Thoughts, Notions and Assumptions””
What great writing!
I can feel myself with you and I know too well what it’s like to make a six hour trip that takes 11 hours and leaves you wanting to cry,
especially for me , since I have a difficult time backing up my horse trailer.
I’m going to look forward to reading more of your blog
thank you so much
Thank you so much for your kind words Susie!!